Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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