Pappa wants mamma naked
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
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