I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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