420 ftw
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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