A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Randomize