lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I can't turn off my feet"
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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