Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Randomize
