How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
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