Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Randomize
