Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
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