these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
