WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm passing your future prison.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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