We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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