I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
