your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
