i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
