in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
