Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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