yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Acid is not a monday night drug
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
