Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
