Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
