Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
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