Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
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Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
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Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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