just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
