im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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