I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Randomize
