Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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