Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize