Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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