Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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