The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize