Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
This is the high leading the old right now
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
