Will you blow on my dice?
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
