where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize