If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
