jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Randomize