Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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