the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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