So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
