that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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