Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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