Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
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