absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Randomize
