Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
