You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize