Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
In other news, I just burned my penis
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
