Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
