its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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