so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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