Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
