Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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